Why I Hated This Christmas Song (But It Changed My Life)

Every year, like clockwork, the holiday season rolls around. The decorations go up, the air smells of cinnamon and pine, and the Christmas songs start playing everywhere. But there’s one song that used to make me cringe: “Happy Xmas (War Is Over)” by John Lennon.

It wasn’t the song itself—I can appreciate its message, its melody, and its sentiment. But there’s one line, right at the beginning, that always hit me in the gut:

“And so this is Christmas, and what have you done?
Another year over, and a new one just begun…”

The Line That Haunted Me

Every time I heard that line, it felt like John Lennon was looking straight at me, asking the one question I couldn’t escape: What have you done this year?

And for years, my answer was always the same: Not enough.

The song reminded me that another year had slipped through my fingers, that the goals I’d dreamed about were still just dreams, and that I’d let fear, procrastination, or distractions keep me from taking action. Hearing it on repeat during the holidays wasn’t inspiring—it was infuriating.

The worst part? There was no escaping it. The song played everywhere—on the radio, in shops, at holiday parties. And every time it did, it felt like a spotlight shining on my failures, asking me, “Why didn’t you make this year count?”

Why I Hated the Reminder

I didn’t hate the song because it was bad. I hated it because it forced me to confront the truth I was trying to avoid: I wasn’t living up to my potential.

It was easier to resent the song than to face the fact that I was letting my life slip through my fingers.

The Turning Point

At some point, though, something shifted. I realised that my hatred for the song wasn’t really about John Lennon’s lyrics—it was about me. The song was just holding up a mirror, reflecting back the discomfort I felt about my own inaction.

And here’s the thing about mirrors: you can either smash them, or you can use them to take a closer look.

I decided to look.

I started asking myself some hard questions:

  • Why was I letting years slip by without making progress?
  • What was holding me back from taking action?
  • What would I need to do differently to answer Lennon’s question with pride, not regret?

The answers weren’t always easy, but they gave me clarity.

Changing the Way I See the Year

Instead of dreading the song, I began to use it as a challenge. Every December, when I heard that line, I asked myself:

  • What have I done this year that matters?
  • What steps have I taken toward the life I want to build?
  • What am I proud of?

It didn’t mean I suddenly had perfect years full of success. But it did mean I started approaching each year with more intention. I stopped letting time slip through my fingers and started taking small, meaningful actions toward my goals.

A Song That Once Haunted Me Now Inspires Me

Today, “Happy Xmas (War Is Over)” doesn’t fill me with dread. It’s still a mirror, but one I no longer avoid. It reminds me to take stock of the year, to celebrate the wins, and to learn from the challenges.

And that line—“And so this is Christmas, and what have you done?”—has become a yearly nudge to live with purpose.

A Challenge for You

If you’ve ever felt the same way about that song, here’s my challenge to you:

  • Use this moment to reflect on your year—not with judgment, but with curiosity.
  • Ask yourself what steps you’ve taken, what you’ve learned, and how you can move forward with more intention.
  • Let this be the year you stop letting time slip away and start making small, meaningful changes.

Because the truth is, another year is almost over, and a new one is about to begin. The question is: What will you do with it?

It’s not too late to make it count. Take the first step today.

The Fear of Failure: Lessons Learned Outside My Comfort Zone

For a long time, I let the fear of failure hold me back. Maybe you know the feeling—that nagging voice in your head that says, “What if this is a complete waste of time? What if I fail and look foolish?”

We have this strange tendency to assume that the things we’re about to try will result in a 100% failure. Before we’ve even taken a single step, we’re convinced it’s doomed. But here’s the thing I’ve learned: we don’t have the answer to that question until we take action.

Failure isn’t guaranteed. Success isn’t guaranteed. It could go either way, and the only way to find out is by stepping outside our comfort zone and trying.

Failure Isn’t Final

When I used to fail at something, I’d take it personally. I’d think, “I’m stupid. I’m untalented. I’ll never make this work.” I convinced myself that the failure wasn’t just about what I did—it was about who I was.

But over time, I discovered a different perspective: failure isn’t us. It’s not a reflection of who we are. Failure is simply the result of a test we tried out.

Think about it like a lab technician running an experiment. If the experiment doesn’t work, the technician doesn’t label themselves a failure—they look at the results, figure out what went wrong, and set up the next test. The experiment failed, not the person who ran it.

The same is true for us. Every time we fail, we’re running an experiment. It’s not about who we are—it’s about what we tried.

The Silver Lining of Failure

Here’s something else I’ve learned: failure always comes with a lesson, even if it stings in the moment.

  • Sometimes, failure shows us exactly where we went wrong, giving us clarity we didn’t have before.
  • Sometimes, it leads to better ideas—ideas we wouldn’t have discovered if we hadn’t hit a wall first.
  • And sometimes, failure simply helps us cross one path off the list so we can focus on the next option.

Failure isn’t the end. It’s a stepping stone, guiding us toward something better.

The Truth About Action

The fear of failure thrives on inaction. As long as we stay in our comfort zone, we can imagine all the ways things might go wrong, but we’ll never actually know. Taking action—even when it’s scary—is the only way to find out what’s on the other side of that fear.

Will it work out? Maybe. Maybe not. But you’ll never have the answer until you try. And even if it doesn’t work, you’ll walk away with a clearer idea of what does.

Embrace the Experiment

If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s this: failure isn’t the end, and it’s definitely not who you are. It’s just a result—one experiment in a lifetime of experiments.

The next time you’re staring down a fear of failure, remind yourself that every step you take brings you closer to clarity, growth, and success. The experiment might fail, but you won’t.

And who knows? That next experiment could be the one that changes everything.