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I Swear, I’m Not A Butt Pincher

….…sometimes life throws a gift your way when you’re not expecting it.

And sometimes in the weirdest ways.

Take for example, the night I met my wife.

The subject line of this email were some of the first words I ever said to her.

I was at a nightclub with some friends when she stood to her full height of 5ft 2 and looked me square in the eye.

She said: “Did you, do it?”

“Do what?”

“Pinch me.”


“Right now, when I was walking past, did you pinch me?”

“I’m not a butt pincher.”

Catherine looked between me and Mickey, who had a drunken grin on his face.

Mickey had a habit of turning into Mr. Tickle when he had drink in him.

“It was you, wasn’t it, Mickey?”

I didn’t know at this stage that they knew each other.


Suddenly the music changed and slowed.

At this point, most of us would go looking for a girl to dance with.

Like the drunken charmer he was,  Mickey slapped me on the back and pushed me toward her.

“Ask her for out for a dance, Barry.”


“If you don’t, I will.”

I knew I had to save her from that fate, And so I did.

Come this September, we’ll be married twenty years.  Still don’t know where those twenty years went. I also don’t know where I’d be if Mickey hadn’t pinched her butt.

Who knows.

It’s like my work book course, it came out of the blue too, and took me somewhere I didn’t see coming.

I’ll be calling on your wisdom again in tomorrow’s email.

Who knows where we’re both going next?

Sometimes it’s nice not having it all planned out.

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